Phone Calls and Music

Hey Andy!

Ironically we got off the phone with each other about an hour ago but I can't stop thinking about you. Tonight's conversation with Taylor really shook me up by the way. We talked about spending the year together possibly over seas and me not doing Timber-lee's LCM program. After she told me those things I started crying... yes, she made fun of me (I cry a lot and she made a joke about my tear ducts being the craziest tear ducts she's ever known of). It was the thought of not being near you that made me really upset. Then I began getting upset at myself for caring too much. Not that I can tell you this to your face, which is probably why I made you this super sonic secret blog site, but I think I'm falling in love with you. Wow, writing that out was very strange but I'm not erasing it... there it is. November 27th, 2011, there are my thoughts about you.

On the phone with Taylor as I continued to cry like a little sally I tried explaining to Taylor was I was freaking out. What really makes me scared about this relationship business is that I've been doing my best to not only maintain physical purity but emotional purity too. Relationships kind of have that unspoken rule that you talk about emotional things... to uh, build emotional connects and stuff. I've been praying about this daily and just asking God to stop things from getting too serious if this isn't His will... and not just saying that but really asking Him to intervene. He keeps reassuring me that this is where I'm supposed to be. I'm keeping my eyes focused on Him and what makes me at ease with this is that I know you are doing the same.

The other part of the conversation that made me laugh on the inside was the fact that you wouldn't let me listen to a "good" country song (if that even exists) because I would read into it even after you told me not to. I did read those lyrics to the song "A Woman Like You". First of all... super cheesy and lame. That song is in no way applicable to what we have for the reasons that you don't play golf, or fish... and stuff. BUT here's a fun fact that I have always been too embarrassed to tell you is that the playlist on your Amazon Cloud Player entitled "Summer" has been read into all over the place. :) You told me that you liked me at that point in time and as soon as I saw that playlist and the songs in it (which are mostly about starting relationships/liking someone) I started reading into them. Not to mention that the song "Where We Gonna Go From Here" by Mat Kearny is like the anthem of all anthems for what was going on for this summer. Ok, but for real, I'm going to stop reading into songs and I'm still going to stay away from country music. That's just dangerous water.

I'm also really happy you're not going to name your future child Hurricane or the other name that you gave the monkey hat. I'm really happy we're dating and I'm excited to see what the future holds for us. I'm excited to see you tomorrow for our date at Steve's! I miss you like crazy right now... but I'm not going to cry; that already happened in the phone conversation with Taylor.